it suddenly hit me

when i was driving down the road rushing around doing errands on my lunch hour. i felt my eyes well up with tears . . .

its been a year. . .

a year ago today I recieved my last chemo dose. in an instant i felt this surge of emotion and flashback of jumbled memories. the tears were not really sadness though. yes, i do still feel sad at times, but it is nothing like it was this time last year. today, the tears were just a release. . . a release of emotion that needed to leave my body.

a year later, almost 3 inches of curly brown hair, a new home, a new job, a new life. . . and working on a new me. . . i can't believe i really did what i did. its like a dream, literally. there are parts that are really clear, but a lot more parts that are sort of just a fog.

today, i celebrate my 1 year chemoversary. . . i celebrate this life with all the good and the bad. i celebrate my family, my friends, my dogs . . . i celebrate the love i have in my heart and i celebrate NOT being scared everyday. most of all i celebrate this feeling of hope that is finally emerging back into my life.